Diary :>

hello!!! this is your webmads here :3. you're on my blog page!!! i'm still unsure of how private i'd like to be here... i guess i'll figure that out as i go! i think this page will generally be pretty lighthearted, but i'll try to write warnings at the start of entries if that changes. like the rest of my site, my goal here is just to have fun!!! expect lots of talk about comics and books i read! stay tuned for an actual first entry~!

hello everyone!! time for first blog entry FOR REALSIES this time!!!! i kept waiting around for something interesting enough to write about to happen... but unfortunately (fortunately...?) my life is not that exciting ':]. I do have one fun thing to write about though: tomorrow i'm going to a craft fair and lunch with a friend! i'm very excited!!!! i'll try and write about it tomorrow afternoon or evening :3. i also got to see some live music earlier today, which was super nice... the last real concert i went to was back in may, which feels longer ago than it actually is. in perhaps less exciting news, i've really been enjoying the new fionna and cake cartoon! i had high hopes for it, and actually rewatched most of adventure time proper in the weeks leading up to it (still such a good show!!!), so i'm glad it's lived up to my expectations so far. i'm excited to see how it wraps up this thursday! one of my good friends has been watching it too, so i've gotten to have a lot of fun discussions :). shortbox comics fair, another thing i'm very excited for (award winning segue lol...) is also almost here! october is my birthday month, so i get to justify splurging on the comics as a birthday treat, which rules. in other october comics news, the next love and rockets issue actually comes out ON my birthday, which is a coincidence that makes me very happy :-). this entry just kind of turned into a list of things i'm excited for, which doesn't bug me too much... i feel like there's a lot to be excited for! i think i'll leave off there for now... i'll do my best to write again soon!

hey! before you read, this entry does contain some talk about unhealthy/restrictive eating patterns (unrelated to eating disorders) and some mention of surgery, though with little detail on either. just wanted to let y'all know in case either of those topics bother anyone.haiiiii everyone. it's been. a while. breaks into a cold sweat. i have been very busy and/or sick unfortunately :[. but i really want to start coding again bc i love it!!! i'm gonna try to start easing myself in again... starting with another blog entry! (forgive me if the way i end up writing things out comes off as clunky, i'm just kind of writing stream of conciousness style). not too much is going on with my right now aside from like... general business. i wanted to start updating this site again over the winter holidays, when i'd have some free time, but then i got REALLY sick. like, probably the sickest i have ever been in my life. i didn't really eat with much regularity for 3-4 weeks, because it would make me feel sick (and then the hunger would ALSO make me feel sick), and then spent another two ish weeks trying to get back to eating foods that weren't just easy to digest carbs. it was miserable!!!! there was also an ice storm that wrecked my pipes during that time, so i had to go stay in a hotel for a few days during this!! not fun!!!! i never got an official diagnosis but i'm fairly sure it was primarily gerd and maybe also the starts of an ulcer. both rly common in my family unfortunately. luckily ppis have kicked its ass so i get to eat like normal again and do things that aren't lie in bed and think about how awful i feel!!! i love you, modern medicine... i guess another upside is that all my bloodwork came back looking great, so i at least know i'm pretty healthy outside of whatever Hell Month was about. i get pretty anxious about my health, so it's nice to know what i'm currently doing is working well for me! it's also definitely given me a renewed passion for food lol. feeling sick was also my final push to start looking into a breast reduction, which is really exciting. it's something i've entertained for years, but only as a fantasy. feeling like garbage for so long really made me feel like taking more control of my body, though. i'm currently a 34n (US size), which on a physical level is absolutely miserable... i think i'd like to be a US d or c if it's possible to go that small. i yearn for the fabled Bra Off The Rack. or even just "bra that doesn't cost me a hundred bucks not counting shipping, because the only companies i can find that make things in my size are based in the UK". my first consultation is in a couple weeks, and i'm both excited and nervous... especially because i've never had any kind of surgery before. crossing my fingers that it goes well, and in the meantime i've been doing a lot of research and making sure to write down anything i want to ask about. in other, unrelated news, it's my mother's birthday tomorrow!!! i'm not going to be able to see her in person, which makes me sad, but my parents and i are going to video chat sometime saturday afternoon. i mailed a nice bath soak and some cookies with personalized birthday messages to her, which i hope she enjoys! she feels harder to shop for than my father, who's always happy with either fun socks or some silly gag gift. i'm lucky and have a pretty great relationship with my parents :-). i guess to close off i'll follow up on last entry's cliffhanger: the craft fair was super fun! i ended up buying a handmade mug and a very cute plush anteater. i tried to be strong and tell myself i didn't need more plushies, but i caved very quickly ':]. i think that's all i have to write for now... i'm going to do my best to make the next entry a lot sooner than five months in the future!!

hello, again!! my life continues to mostly be Busy above all else lol. but some exciting news: sometime between 24 hours to one week from today, i'll know what insurance has decided re: covering a breast reduction. half of me is expecting to be rejected, but the other half knows my case is honestly pretty airtight as far as medical justifications go... US health insurance is always "fun" to deal with ':]. the surgeon i'm probably going to go with has said that insurance is getting more open to these cases, though, so hopefully i don't have to deal with rejection lol. i'm still hoping to be able to get surgery this june!!!

in some other news, i am swearing to myself that i'm GONNA get that recipe page up by the end of may. i want to start out with some kind of easy dessert, but after that i have a ton of choices. part of what i wanna do is link back to other peoples' recipes that i like, which will be the hardest part to figure out a format for... there's just so many ways i could do it lol. but aside from that, i have a bunch of family recipes i'd love to share (+ a few of my own invention >:}). one i've thought of but honestly don't know if there's any interest in is my great-grandmother's gefilte fish recipe. for anyone who doesn't know, gefilte fish is an ashkenazi jewish dish (and noted acquired taste...) consisting primarily of ground and poached fish. here is its wikipedia page, if you want to learn more. a lot of people just go for the jarred kind, but my grandmother, who can't stand that stuff, has spoken pretty fondly of her mother's homemade version. between the labor that goes into making it and the fact that hardly anyone in my family eats gefilte fish, the recipe quite literaly spends its days collecting dust. i think it might be nice to give it a second life if anyone feels like they'd enjoy it.